(Just for your entertainment or maybe just mine)

These are just some funny things I can't do when I get home…

There will be no picking up every child that crosses my path- Because we all know that mothers in the States freak out when any stranger comes within five feet of their small child.

I can't speak Siswiti to every black child I see- For one the kids won't know what the crap I'm saying and two I will look like the biggest idiot ever.

I will have to start saying hey can I have more ketchup again instead of "tomato sauce".

There will be no screaming "YEBO!" when something goes my way.

I will have to order French fries again instead of "chips".

Praise the Lord I won't have to buy "airtime" anymore for my cellphone.

I definitely won't tell children I am going to beat them. - its not as bad as it sounds… because we say it in Siswiti.

I will not expect to be greeted by someone I don't know.- its culture here to say hello to everyone here in Swaziland, but in American we avoid saying hey to people we do know.

There will be hardly any excitement about eating at KFC, because we all know that we only eat there once a year when we don't have anything to cook at home for family dinner.

Phrases like:

"Is it?"

"Eiesh…"

"Sorry sisi"

"Where do you stay?"

"Can I please have a Fanta grape and a chicken burger?"

"Shame"

"Did you go to the filling station?"

"What is your sir name?"

"How many years are you?"

WILL NOT BE UNDERSTOOD

 No:

Hanging laundry and wet towels on my bed.

Hand washing my clothes

Playing cards for fun everyday until mid-night

Going to bed at 8:30

Watching my roommates get dreads and a weave

Busting out in Siswiti worship songs

Getting excited when my parents call

Taking pictures of small cute children

Responding with "I'm fine"

Walking more than 30 ft- there is hardly any walking to get to your destination in the US

Using my towel for 3 weeks without washing it

Paying for internet

Internet will not be a chore

Going weeks without shaving my legs as I wear skirts everyday

Farmer's tan

Instant juice